Who Will Come?

You should decide if there will be a public announcement in the newspaper, whether a written mailing to certain friends and associates seems better, or whether phone calls and the local "grapevine" will be sufficient notice.




Who Will Lead the Service?
Obviously, clergy are likely to be involved with any service in a church, temple, synagogue, or mosque—the program determined by religious practice and protocol. You can certainly ask clergy to participate in a service held elsewhere, too. But even religious services are being adapted to allow participation from attendees, with people invited to share their memories and thoughts after the initial service, making the occasion more memorable.

As for others who might lead or facilitate a service, the personalities of the people involved may dictate the best choice. A spouse who is shy about public speaking would likely defer to an adult son or daughter who is at ease leading the local Rotary or Girl Scout Jamboree. Maybe a best friend or sibling could be asked to preside. If several will participate, it's a good idea for one of them to be designated with the coordinator's role, to avoid awkward hesitations as to who should do what next.

It is always nice to find a role for children to play if the deceased was a special person in their lives. Handing out flowers or programs can be managed by even young children or grandchildren. Some may wish to draw pictures for a memory book.