Thursday, May 24, 2007

The Service Itself

If there are no religious dictates, you may want to pick a theme of remembrance exemplifying the deceased. Will he be remembered most for his civic activity or his wild ties and the story behind each? Will she be remembered for her gardens and charity work or her practical jokes? Are there favorite readings of the deceased? Bible verses or Zen philosophy? Poetry? (Ernest Morgan's book Dealing Creatively with Death has some excellent examples and suggestions.)

Did the deceased leave writings, maybe instructional or inspirational letters a relative has saved? You could ask friends and relatives to write up a favorite memory to read aloud or to be read. (Having those vignettes in writing, too, will mean a lot to a surviving spouse or off-spring after the service.) Some families may decide to print a formal program for the service, listing music to be played and the readings to be given, but it is not necessary.

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