10th anniversary of Diana's death marked

By ROBERT BARR, Associated Press Writer

LONDON - Princess Diana's family solemnly marked the 10th anniversary of her death Friday at a service organized by her sons, while admirers tied scores of bouquets, poems and portraits to the gates of her former home.




"To us, just two loving children, she was quite simply the best mother in the world," Prince Harry, her younger son, said in a eulogy.

"When she was alive, we completely took for granted her unrivaled love of life, laughter, fun and folly," Harry said.

"She was our guardian, friend and protector. She never once allowed her unfaltering love us to go unspoken or undemonstrated."

It was a day for broadcasting video snippets of one wedding and funeral; for rehashing the rights and wrongs of the failed marriage of Diana and Prince Charles.

It was one more day for dredging up questions about how she came to die in a car crash in Paris with her boyfriend Dodi Fayed, and for the Daily Telegraph to publish an essay which explained "why we were right to weep for Diana."

Harry and his brother, Prince William, were credited with organizing the noontime service at the Guards' Chapel near Buckingham, but Charles was blamed by many for the furor over an invitation to his current wife.

Camilla, who was blamed by Diana for breaking up her marriage, decided to stay home. That decision followed quickly after the Mail on Sunday published a commentary by Diana's friend, Rosa Monckton, saying the princess would have been "astonished" that Camilla was invited.

"Actually, she would have been astonished to learn that her former husband had married his longtime mistress," Monckton wrote.

Camilla's first wedding, to Andrew Parker Bowles, had been at the Guards' Chapel.

A few hundred people had gathered outside by midmorning, in contrast to the masses who lined the route of Diana's funeral procession to Westminster Abbey 10 years ago.

"She reached our lives deeply, even in America. She brought life to the palace and warmth, and that's what the monarchy needed," said Arlene Fitch, 54, of Boston, one of the early arrivals.

Fitch and her sister, Marie Schofield, 46, from Florida, said they planned their vacation to be in London at the time of the service.

"She (Diana) got married the same year as me, she had children the same year as me and, as her boys have grown up, they have done just the same kind of things as our boys would do," Schofield said.

Diana's most ardent admirers tied scores of bouquets, poems and pictures to the gates of Kensington Palace, Diana's former home, but the display paled in comparison to the vast carpet of blossoms that accumulated in the days immediately after her death.

Rev. Frank Gelli, who has led an informal service outside Kensington Palace every year, said this probably would be the last one. "It would be good if the princess was allowed to rest," he told a reporter.

Eileen Neathey, 56, of London, treasured the memory of a chance encounter with Diana at a hospital, where Neathey's mother was a patient.

"I had been up all night and was very upset, and when I bumped into Diana I burst into tears," said Neathey, who was outside Kensington Palace. "She put her arm round me and comforted me — that's the way she was."

John Loughrey, 52, had painted "Diana" on his forehead and "the truth?" on his cheek. "We must get to the bottom of how she died," Loughrey said.

"I saved up money to be here today," said Susan Chickowski, 38, a florist from Saskatchewan, Canada.

"When she passed away, I felt like I'd lost my best friend. She's been such a big part of my life," Chickowski said. "Now it's time to move on, 10 years on, for myself personally."

Queen Elizabeth II headed the list of guests at the service, along with her husband Prince Philip. Prince Edward, Charles' younger brother, and his sister Princess Anne — who reportedly didn't intend to come — were in the congregation.

Prime Minister Gordon Brown and former Prime Minister John Major, who was in office when the royal marriage broke up, also attended. More than 110 representatives of charities and other organizations that Diana supported.

Sir Elton John came, but would not reprise his reworking of "Candle in the Wind," which he performed at the funeral.

Diana's former butler, Paul Burrell, who wrote two gossipy books about his years in her service, was not invited. Nor was Patrick Jephson, the princess' former private secretary, who also wrote two books about her.

Mohamed al Fayed, who accuses Prince Philip of masterminding a plot to kill Diana and Dodi Fayed, also was not on the guest list. He observed his own two minutes of silence at Harrods, his department store, an hour before the memorial service. His daughter, Camilla al Fayed, attended the official service.

"There's definitely something more to it than meets the eye, and I think Mr. al Fayed is probably right that the government were involved," said Alison Wormall, 46, who traveled from central England to join the observance at Harrods.

A poll commissioned by Channel 4 television found that 25 percent of the public believes Diana was murdered, but 59 percent thought it was an accident. The telephone poll of 1,016 adults conducted this week had a margin of error of plus or minus 3 percentage points.

A prayer written for the memorial service by Rowan Williams, the archbishop of Canterbury, recalled "her vulnerability and her willingness to reach out to the excluded and forgotten."

The royal family had refrained from any public remembrance of the anniversary of the princess' death.

This year, however, William and Harry took the lead in organizing the memorial service, as well as a rock concert on Diana's birthday, July 1, which drew 70,000 paying fans.

___

Associated Press Writer Romina Spina contributed to this story.

It Wasn't A Funeral

By Simone Nathan

I had traveled on that train often enough to be acquainted with most of the passengers who always took the first car. This morning was very peculiar. Nearly every other seat was taken by a young man. They were not sitting together, two by two, as passengers usually did. Each was neatly dressed in a dark suit. Each wore a crisp white or light blue shirt. Each wore a carefully tied necktie.

Many had opened a copy of the Wall Street Journal. The car was unusually quiet.

I stood it as long as I could. Finally I spoke to the somber quiet. “Where’s the funeral?” I asked. The young man seated in front of me said quietly, “It’s not a funeral ma’am.” “What is it then?” I asked with real puzzlement.

“We’re from the Graduate School of Business of the University of Wisconsin at Madison. This is the Finance Class, and we’re going in to Chicago to hear a special speaker.”

“Oh,” I said with dawning understanding. Brightly I asked, “Are the girls in another car?” “There are no girls, ma’am,” said the polite student.

“What do you mean, ‘there are no girls.’ Do you mean to tell me that there are no female students in your class? Or just that they were not interested in the speaker?”

“There are no girls in our class, ma’am.”

I was dumbfounded. Here were all these nice-looking young men, well on their way to the credentials for a job in the broad field of financial services…decent well-paid jobs, and no women were in training last year in that class. I was also angry.

Why were there no women? What are the social blocks in 2006 that prevent bright young women from developing the career paths in this field, that currently is starving to fill jobs in accounting, just one aspect of this wide field of work?

Why are women still so willing to let the men in their lives own all the knowledge about the financial side of life? Why does my friend, who is a senior financial planner, so often have to help bereaved women learn their financial fate, just as they have become widows and are often facing some kind of decreasing health condition?

Perhaps most aggravating of all, in this 21st century, in the richest country of the world, why are women so much more likely to fall into poverty in their most vulnerable years, due to a combination of lifelong lower paid work and lack of adequate financial information?

Although my experience with the class of young men at the peak of preparation for rewarding life ahead was nothing like a funeral, I thought later that it was not about full life either. If you are a woman reading this, I urge you to wake up this part of your life now! If you are a man reading this, and there are women and girls in your life whom you love, I urge you to encourage their interest in every question about savings and earnings, taxes and investment, the real cost of your consumer goods, the danger of overextended credit card use.

You can begin right now by following the Ten Commandments that I have laid out in my free e-course. You are urgently invited to begin TODAY. Just click on http://www.www.goldafter50.com/

Simone Nathan Author of “Going for Gold after 50: An Illustrated Guide to High Probability Investing for The Plus Years”. Discover how to put the investing odds greatly in your favor at http://www.goldafter50.com/

Personal, spiritual, financial, healthful life planning — http://www.dreamcatcherprogram.com/

Death Calculator-How Long will You Live?

By Barbara Kimmel

Take the Quiz!

Answer all quiz items as truthfully as possible – in other words, to the best of your knowledge. Don't guess. Begin with 79 years, then add or subtract years based on the scoring of your answers on each item. Your completed (total) score is a rough estimate of your current life expectancy.

1. Where is your ancestral home? (if not given, enter a score of 0). US = minus 2. Austria-UK = minus 1. Canada-France-Italy = 0. Australia-Singapore-Sweden = plus 2. Japan = plus 3. FACT: Life expectancy varies by nation due to genetic and cultural differences.

2. What is your gender ? Female = plus 1. Male = minus 2. FACT: Life expectancy favors the female gender regardless of culture.

3. Do you have an annual physical exam? Yes = plus 3. No = minus 3. FACT: Many diseases (cancers, hypertension) in later life are asymptomatic, go unnoticed and untreated.

4. Do you have parents, grandparents, or great-grandparents who lived to 85-plus? Add 2 for each 85-plus relative. FACT: Research demonstrates that long-lived parents tend to produce long-living children.

5. Do you volunteer on a weekly basis? Yes = plus 2. No = minus 1.

FACT: Studies confirm that volunteering focuses attention away from ourselves and onto others.

6. Do you live alone? Yes = minus 3. No = 0. FACT: Adults who live alone tend to be less well-nourished, more isolated, and less nurtured.

7. Are you able to laugh at and learn from your mistakes? Yes = plus 1. No = minus 3. FACT: Laughter, humility, and a positive outlooks are linked to increased life expectancy.

8. Do you have a confidant who listens to your most intimate concerns? Yes = plus 1. No = minus 2.

FACT: Confidants offer emotional catharsis and a sense of personal worth to those in crisis.

9. Do you engage in daily mental exercises such as puzzles, games, learning or problem-solving? Yes = plus 4. No = 0. FACT: Individuals that continually challenge their minds suffer fewer cognitive disorders.

10. Do you engage in some form of daily aerobic exercise such as swimming, jogging or biking? Yes = plus 2. No = 0. FACT: Exercising at one’s target heart rate strengthens the heart and boosts metabolism.

11. Do you eat a balanced diet, including fresh fruit, vegetables, and whole grains? Yes = plus 2. No = minus 3. FACT: Balanced dieters experience lower risk of both genetic and culturally related diseases.

12. Do you smoke a pack of cigarettes daily? Yes = minus 5 for men, minus 10 for women. No = 0. FACT: Smoking causes nearly half a million cancer and lung disease deaths every year.

13. Do you live with, work with, or spend time with people who smoke? Yes = minus 1 for men, minus 2 for women. No = 0. FACT: Although close association with smokers is thought to reduce a person’s life expectancy by one year, recent research suggests this association may reduce life expectancy by two years.

14. Does your body weight “yo-yo” as you go on and off diet fads? Yes = minus 5. No = 0. FACT: Unorthodox dietary regimens stress the heart and immune system, increasing the risk of disease.

15. Do you own a pet? Yes = plus 2. No = 0. FACT: Peer-reviewed scientific journals substantially support longevity benefits of pet companionship. (Note: Avoid exotic pets, such as parrots, monkeys, reptiles, or rodents. These animals have been known to carry diseases that can be transmitted to humans.)

16. When writing, which hand do you use? Left-handed = minus 1. Right-handed = 0. Life is stressful for lefties living in a made-for right-hand world. FACT: Lefties live in a world where most objects are designed for right-handed people. Objects such as scissors, pencil sharpeners, door openers, and can openers are rarely designed for left-handed people.

17. How tall are you? For every inch of your height that exceeds 5’8” = subtract six months. FACT: Size does matter, but not in any way you may have thought. Shorter people live longer.

18. Do you belong to any religious group, and do you practice your faith? Yes = plus 2. No = 0. FACT: Attending to both physical and spiritual needs lowers morbidity and mortality.

19. Do you have two or more daughters? Yes = plus 3. No = 0. Daughters are elder caregivers. FACT: Daughters provide the bulk of eldercare. Even daughters-in-law provide more care than do sons.

20. Do you use stress management techniques such as meditation, quiet time or visiting a spa? Yes = plus 4. No = minus 3. FACT: Because there is no escape from stress in our modern society, stress management is the best response.

21. Do you walk to work? Yes = plus 2. Ride to work? Yes = plus 1. Drive to work? Yes = minus 3. FACT: Walking offers fitness benefits, as well as a sense of self-reliance and personal freedom (no gridlock!).

22. Have you had cosmetic surgery? Yes = plus 5. (But subtract 1 for each additional surgery during the same decade.) FACT: Cosmetic surgery reduces age phobia and age discrimination and evokes a positive response from a youth-obsessed world. Too many cosmetic surgeries (that is, more than one every 10 years), however, may actually accelerate the aging process.

23. Do you fear the uncertainties of growing old? Yes = minus 1. No fear = plus 0. FACT: Fear of aging increases your risk of emotional illnesses such as self hatred, denial and depression.

24. Do you routinely use cannabis? Yes = minus 4. No = 0. FACT: Scientific studies claim that frequent cannabis use increases the risk of physical and mental disorders—such as lung and heart disease and psychosis—by as much as 150 percent.

25. Are you sexually promiscuous? Yes = minus 6. No = 0. FACT: Engaging in unprotected sex with multiple partners greatly increases the risk of sexually transmitted diseases.

26. Are you engaged in a long-term relationship of trust and mutual respect? Yes = plus 5. No = 0. FACT: A relationship of this nature fulfills emotional, social, and physical needs and lowers morbidity and mortality risks.

27. Are all your friends the same age as you? Yes = minus 2. Do you have friends of different ages? Yes = plus 1. FACT: Having friends from a younger generation counters an age-related decrease in your social network. Social isolation sets the stage for a variety of age-accelerating conditions. Those who live alone, for example, have a shorter life expectancy due to poor nutrition; the absence of companionship and someone who can intervene during periods of depression or physical illness; a decreasing need to get dressed and groomed; and safety issues (for example, the hearing impaired often misinterpret abnormal sounds, such as bathroom water pipes gurgling, as human voices whispering) and no one is present to tell them otherwise.

28. Do you keep a written list of specific life goals with time frames for completion? Yes = plus 1. No = 0. FACT: Studies of performance behavior link specific goals and achievements to quality of life.

29. Do you have a family (blood relatives) history of cardiovascular disease or cancer prior to age 50? Subtract 2 per occurrence. FACT: Family history demonstrates just how many cultural risks are increased by genetic predisposition. Culture (lifestyle) and genetics (inherited conditions) moderate the aging process. For example, some ethnic groups share a history of longevity, as do the children of long-lived parents.

30. Do you have a family history of obesity, diabetes, or chronic depression? Subtract 2 per occurrence.

FACT: Family history demonstrates just how many cultural risks are enhanced by genetic predisposition.

31. Do you take a once-daily dose (physician-approved) of an anti-inflammatory agent? Yes = plus 4. No = 0. FACT: Scientific studies of anti-inflamatory drugs such as aspirin and statins show a reduced risk of cardio-vascular diseases such as heart attack and stroke.

32. Do you have an annual physical exam that includes a review of diet, over-the-counter medications, prescriptions, and dietary supplements? Yes = plus 2. No = minus 3. FACT: Without oversight, combining prescription and over-the-counter medications with dietary supplements can be life threatening.

33. Does your dental care routine include daily brushing and flossing, plus a six-month checkup and cleaning? Yes = 0. No = minus 1.

FACT: A lack of preventive dental care and poor oral health habits raises the risk of infection elsewhere in the body, such as the heart.

34. Do you compute your daily caloric needs, then reduce caloric intake by 20 percent? Yes = plus 2. No = 0. FACT: Research demonstrates a strong relationship between reduced caloric intake and longevity. If you answered “No” to this question, read the chapter, Thoughts for Food, for more information about computing your daily caloric needs and the benefits of reducing your caloric intake by 20 percent.

35. Do you have one daily serving of red wine (7 oz), purple grape juice (7 oz), or RDA grape-seed extract? Yes = plus 2. No = minus 1. FACT: The agent in purple grapes enhances cardiovascular health by flushing cholesterol from the arteries.

36. Do you have one daily serving of oatmeal or oatbran (one -half cup, or one 70- gram granola bar)? Yes= plus 1. No= minus1. FACT: The fiber in oatmeal enhances cardiovascular health by flushing cholestoral from the arteries.

37. Are you involved in supervised strength training 3 times per week? Yes = 0. No = minus 1. FACT: Muscular strength, flexibility, and coordination are essential to daily living and reduce the likelihood of tripping and falling.

38. Do you have a daily exercise routine that consists of at least 20 minutes of supervised cardiovascular training at your target heart rate, as well as warm-up and cool-down periods? Yes = plus 2, No = 0. FACT: Cardiovascular and metabolic benefits occur when exercise is performed at your target heart rate. If you answered “No” to this question, read chapter five, Full Body Contact, for more information about calculating your target heart rate and the benefits of a regular exercise routine.

39. Is your home and indoor work space adequately ventilated by frequently opening windows, or equipped with air filtration that can filter microscopic particles? Yes = plus 1. No = minus 1. FACT: Environmental studies have documented increasing evidence of cardiopulmonary diseases generated from indoor air and materials. Common items you have and use in and around your home – such as carpets and furniture, insecticides, cleansers, and paint and varnish – can release toxins into the air. In addition, all homes absorb toxins from the outside environment through normal cracks in foundations and walls.

40. Do you eat or drink more than two daily servings of caffeinated products, such as coffee, tea, cola, or chocolate? Yes = minus 2. No = 0. FACT: Caffeine helps headache pain, but its toxic affect elsewhere elevates the risk of cancer and heart disease.

41. Is your BMI (body mass index) 25 or greater? Yes = minus 4. No = 0. FACT: A Body Mass Index of 25 or above increases the risk of diabetes, heart attack, stroke, and hypertension. Clinical obesity has multiple negative and long-term effects on organs throughout the body. If you do not know how to calculate your Body Mass Index, read chapter five, Full Body Contact, for more information.

42. Is the average time you take to consume your meals more than 30 minutes? = 0. Less than 30 minutes? = minus 1.

FACT: Your brain requires 30 minutes to measure fullness, by which time you're often on a second or third helping.

43. Do you eat, drink, or use a cell phone while driving your vehicle? Yes = minus 1. No = 0. FACT: These distracting behaviors elevate your risk of frightening close calls and outright accidents.

44. Do you have a consistent work schedule (i.e., work 9 to 5)? = 0. Or do you have an inconsistent work schedule (shift work that changes schedule)? = minus 2.

FACT: One in four workers is in a shift-work occupation that results in chronic sleep deprivation.

45. Within a 24-hour day, do you sleep nine or more hours? Yes = minus 1. Do you sleep 6-8 hours? Yes = plus 2. Do you sleep 5 hours or fewer? Yes = 1. FACT: On average, most people need between 6 and 8 hours of sleep. Sleep deprivation is associated with poor concentration, more frequent accidents, and substandard effort.

46. Can you list symptoms associated with colon cancer? Yes = plus 1. No = minus 2. FACT: It is not necessary for this cancer to be so dangerous to your health. Get a checkup, now.

47. Can you list symptoms of adult-onset diabetes? Yes = plus 2. No = minus 3. FACT: Genetics, lifestyle, dietary habits, or a combination of the three are all risk factors.

48. Women only: Can you list breast cancer symptoms? Yes = plus 2. No = minus 3. FACT: Preventive measures such as breast self-examination and mammography remain under-utilized.

49. Can you list high blood pressure symptoms? Yes = minus 2. No = 0 FACT: There are no symptoms associated with high blood pressure; therefore, you should have your blood pressure checked regularly.

50. Women only: Have you had a bone density test as a preventive step against osteoporosis? Yes = plus 1, No = 0. FACT: Osteoporosis is more prevalent in women and increases the risk of back and hip fractures. Start monitoring early. As a preventive health measure, women should monitor their calcium needs as early as age 23 and their bone density as early as age 30.

51. Men only: Can you list prostate cancer symptoms? Yes = plus 2. No = minus 2. FACT: After age 50, your doctor should monitor prostate health by reliable digital or PSA testing.

52. Men only: Can you list testicular cancer symptoms? Yes = 0. No = minus 1. FACT: Avoid clothing fabric or styles that elevate testicle temperature. Monitor on a regular basis by inspecting the soft tissue of the testicles for lumps and painful areas; if found, see your doctor for a professional examination.

53. Women only: Can you list ovarian cancer symptoms? Yes = plus 2. No = minus 2. FACT: Early risks exist but increase after menopause, and in association with advancing age.

54. Can you list heart attack symptoms? Yes = plus 1. No = minus 2. FACT: Learn the symptoms and immediate interventions. Learn Cardiopulmonary Resusciation (CPR) for protecting loved ones.

55. How would you rate your sex life? Satisfactory = plus 1. Not sure = minus 0. Not satisfactory = minus 1. FACT: Overstimulation by advertising, entertainment, and fashion results in a genuine need for a positive sexual outlet. The many ways in which the body benefits from a satisfying sex life are well documented at the National Institutes on Aging Web site located at www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/sexualhealthissues.

Now add it all up. Your score is an estimate of how long you can expect to live. A score of less than 79 years should alert you to take positive action. In fact, 75% of longevity predictors are based on lifestyle, not genes. Remember, long life depends on seven factors: genetic inheritance (good genes give you a good head start), physical fitness, mental fitness (exercising your mind), emotional fitness (meaningful lives last longer), spiritual fitness (interpreting the purpose of life), food fitness (healthy nutrition and diet) and environmental fitness (limiting our exposure to toxic chemicals). Remember, the key to a long and healthy life is more than smart genes and dumb luck.

Low score? It's never too late to make positive lifestyle changes. A complete lifestyle plan, in an interactive question & answer format is available in Dr. David Demko's book, "Live Well Now, Dr. David Demko's Anti-Aging Plan to Youth'n Your Life".

Barbara Kimmel is a publisher and publicist. She is the publisher of David Demko's book. For more information about this book and other healthy lifestyle publications visit http://www.nextdecade.com

Jonah and the Withered Tree

By Rick Frechette

Yesterday, I sat on a hot rock on a hot road in the hot sun in a hot slum, for nearly an hour, trying to get my senses back. I don’t remember ever being so sad and tired, so sick of it all, so overcome with feelings of hopelessness and futility. That the rock was in the middle of the infamous Cite Soleil is not exactly a sideline to the story. If anyone thinks Cite Soleil is a tropical paradise, today’s New York Times would have set them straight. Even the UN is afraid to go there, as are the two million inhabitants of Port au Prince. I was there to answer a simple question. Can you or can’t you trust in the basic goodness of human beings? I had always believed you could, but now I was absolutely in doubt. And it wasn’t just a red truck, but even my vocation, that hung in the balance.





It all started on Sunday, when we were bitten by the ancient serpent of evil, and it was a very nasty bite. Our whole little troop was kidnapped from the cemetery at Drouillard, as they set out to bury a small child who had died in our hospital. Yes, the whole troop, even the small dead body, gone in a minute with a band of thugs.

Then the troop was broken up. The grieving mother was pulled violently from the red truck that serves as our hearse. She was robbed and harassed and threatened and then told to run for her life, bullets ringing out after her. Frantically she ran, like a rabid dog, terrorized, not even knowing where to go, and having no idea if and where her precious child would be laid to rest. Emmanuel was hauled back up to the cemetery where he was robbed of the few dollars he had. He was threatened with death, reproached strongly for having so little money in his pocket, and sent running for his life, like the mother.

Eric and the dead child were taken in the red truck, deep into the slums at Drouillard. It seems that someone from the gang suddenly saw by a human light, and said to their leader, “Boss, he was going to bury this child. Why don’t let him go and just keep the truck?” Eric found himself dismissed with a grunt, and, after being robbed, went walking the few kilometers back to the cemetery in the hot sun, coffin on his head, heavy with its precious load. This road was absolutely deserted, and he had every reason to fear attack from any quarter. But, as we all know, the worst attacks always come from within.

Somewhere along that abandoned roadway, as he tread his way so carefully, the serpent bit again. Eric himself being an ex-orphan (from our own home) and an ex-con (yes, we sometimes fail), suddenly found himself thinking that I would never believe that he had been kidnapped, and the red truck was stolen. Surely, I would see that story as a cover-up for him stealing the truck himself. Tormented by these thoughts, which grew in strength in the course of the long hot day, his mind became more twisted and distorted. So much so, that when I finally met him for the first time since his ordeal, he launched a full scale verbal rage at me, accusing me of caring nothing for his situation and doing nothing to help.

I was absolutely baffled, and had no idea what he was thinking. In fact, I had gotten the call that he was kidnapped as I was starting Sunday mass at our orphanage in the mountains. By cell phone, I had already organized an army of people to help him. And I was assured by the gang leaders that he would be released. But none of this would matter to him, any more than a poem would matter to a raging bull. Now it was my turn to be doubly stung.

I am not a stranger to Cite Soleil. We have many involvements there: water delivery, two schools, clinics, emergency medical help, ice cream runs for the children, etc. I had no hesitation heading there to get to the bottom of this whole incident with the gangs. As soon as I arrived, I chose that hot rock in the middle of the street as the throne of my protest. Two different gang leaders came to talk to me. Why was I on the rock? If I wanted the truck back why didn’t I just say so? Please go home, we will send the truck to you before then end of the day. OK, so you refuse to go without the truck. At least move to the shade until we get it. We will buy you a coke.

It wasn’t just the truck. I was protesting what was done to a dead child, to a grieving mother, to Eric and Emmanuel, to my whole team, to the whole country. It wasn’t just a truck.

When I wouldn’t budge, the leader called Bazo finally said to me, “Mon Père, have you gone crazy?”

Am I crazy? Are you sure your question is for me? Your friends kidnap the dead, and I am the crazy one? Why are you crushing the people? Why? This poor woman, already weighed down by poverty and sorrow, had this small chance to bury her child with tenderness. And you smashed her chance. If we didn’t bury this child ourselves, the body would wind up at TiTanyin as food for dogs and pigs. On top of her poverty and sadness you heap on terror, and send her running in fear and despair. And you have the gall to ask me if I am crazy?

The red truck was rolled up to me, curbside. Complete: battery and jack, radio and papers, complete. “Here now. Please get out of the sun. They didn’t know it was one of your trucks. Why don’t you mark all your trucks a certain way so everyone will know them?” Really. Do you need to mark even a hearse? Are even the dead not spared this nightmare?

When I finally got home, I stopped in the chapel for a quiet minute. There in the corner was Eric, sobbing. I sat next to him and he flooded with tears. He had heard that I went myself to Cite Soleil for the truck. So he knew I believed him. He let out his doubt, that I would never have believed him. Deep sobs. “Eric, you are keeping yourself in prison now. This kind of thinking will never help you. It’s no good for you. I love you and I believe in you. That’s what is good for you. And you are good for me. For God sake, be free of this twisted thinking.” I took off the simple, carved cow-horn cross I have worn around by neck for many years and placed it around his neck. No great get as far as jewelry goes, but I needed to give him a deep sign, something to stay with him. Then he asked me if I knew what was, for him, the worst part of the whole ordeal. He explained to me that the worst part was standing helplessly as a poor grieving mother ran off in confusion and anguish. How he wishes he could find her and help her, and tell her that he saw the funeral all the way to the end, and had buried her little child tenderly. As I watched his face and listened to his words, all my energy returned to me with a surge.

Yes, human beings are basically very, very good.

Off to bed. This is more than enough for one day. But not without reading the words of a favorite hymn:

“We will run, and not grow weary, for our God will be our strength, And we will fly like the eagle, we will rise again.”

Director NPHI Team for Excellence in Healthcare
NPH International - caring for orphaned and abandoned children

What do the Stars Foretell?

By Ramani Iyer

My uncle was known for his famous short temper. He was owning a farm land in his village, and in those days, during the British rule in India, in 1930s or so, he was a young man,and was just then married. As per the customs and culture in those days, he was married when he was young; he was hardly 20 years old and his wife was only 16 years ! The farming work was done by workers and the only work left to my uncle was to inspect the field in the early morning, during his walk, come back home along with his elder brother and after an early lunch, settle down for a game of playing cards in the shaded portico of the house, where all other friends would join the play. It will continue for hours together, where betting used to pep up the interest in the game. Any external interference, other than regular refreshments supplied from inside the house, would be frowned upon.

There was a middle aged man in the village, who was declared to be affected mentally and who used to roam the streets, without any work,used to come to see my uncle also. There used to be a high level of sympathy and tolerance for these kind of people in those days and he would be given free food, sometime money also- though he would not know what to do with that ! On this fateful day, this guy visited the house when the play was in full swing and where my uncle was steadily losing !

He was watching this for some time and abruptly asked my uncle, " What is your birth star "? My uncle was visibly annoyed over this uncalled for intrusion. He glared at him and asked sarcastically, " Why ? are you going to predict my future "?

The man replied in the affirmative. My uncle was really angry with him. he said " If you can predict my future with my star, you can predict my star also ". The man was unruffled and calmly told him that it was not a problem at all ! He went out to the street, looked up in the sky, in the broad-day light for a few minutes, and came back. He asked my uncle whether he was born under a particular star ! My uncle was taken aback! In fact, that was his birth star. He looked at him, unable to speak a word.

Thereupon, the man informed my uncle that his wife would die after giving birth to a male child, and the child would also die within a month. My uncle would marry for the second time but he would not be blessed with a child. His second wife also would die and he would marry for the third time; all this would be within a span of 7 years. After the third marriage, he would lead a comfortable life but would not be blessed with a child. At the fag end of his life, during his old age, his third wife would also die due to an accident ! Hearing this, my uncle became very agitated. Before he could get physical and beat him up, his friends stopped him. The game ended abruptly and my uncle was very depressed over this issue.

After an year, his wife delivered a male child. Within fifteen days, the child developed jaundice and died within a few days. Medical treatment was very primitive in those days and in a village, one can not expect a learned doctor. Very sadly, his wife also died within a month.




Within one year, he was married again and his second wife, true to the prediction, died within 6 months ! My uncle was really alarmed over these happenings ! All his relatives and friends consoled him and after a lapse of one year, he was married , the third time ! At this point of time, he was only 30 years old. Remarriage was a common feature those days, especially due to the culture of child marriage. While the men could marry second time, the same was not extended to the women ! They were to spend the rest of their lives, once their husbands died !

My uncle lived a comfortable life and I used to visit his house frequently, since he was lonely and had no one else to spend time with.

At the age of 78, when his wife was 68 years old, they went to a temple one day for worshipping. As they were walking, one of the trucks which was coming from the opposite direction, lost its control and came rushing towards them. My uncle jumped into a small pit nearby, by a reflex action. My aunt was stunned and stood there only ! The truck hit her directly and she collapsed in front of him and died ! We went for the funeral and tried to console my uncle. My uncle stayed with my elder brother till his end came, after 5 years. But then, the prediction had come true ! He used to feel sad most of the times in the memories of his younger days and we used to comfort him.

I recall this incident of prediction, by a mentally deranged person who had no back up information,though the prediction was totally true ! We have no scientific explanations for many things in our lives !

Author is a freelance writer and he writes in other blogs http://www.create-destiny.blogspot.com/
http://www.blogit.com/ under the name read4joy

Why Does My Loved One Have to Suffer?

By Sam Oliver

Not long ago, I visited a man whose wife was dying of cancer. He retired early in life, so he and his wife could travel the country on his Harley Davidson motorcycle. He was a big man, and his wife was tiny. But, their love for one another was deep and knew no size and shape after 45 years of being married to one another. He shared with me many stories of there life together. He was deep in grief.

Over the years, I have heard surviving loved ones of dying patients wonder “why does my loved one have to suffer?” I will often hear that my spouse, uncle, aunt, mother, or father has been a good person. It doesn't make sense to have to watch my loved one go through this people say. After having many years to ponder these reflections, I have come to believe there is "NOT" an easy answer to this question and the mind wanderings that go with it. These expressions come from such a deep place within us that to give an easy answer would pull people from this place they are asking us to meet them in.

The place I am referring to is a dying loved one’s soul. Caregivers are being ask to meet them in a place where suffering no longer exists. Thomas Moore, in "The Care of the Soul," refers to the soul as a place where one's imagination and heart join on a journey the physical body cannot move into. This is the place whereby one's thoughts, feelings, and spirit come to embrace what is beyond us.

When a loved one asks us, "why does my loved one have to suffer?” “Why did this happen to my spouse, daughter, son, sister, brother, or others.” We are being invited to listen to their soul and offer unconditional love. This act of non-judgmental care is a spatial quality of existence enabling us to care for another's soul. Why? Because at the deepest level of our being we know there is not a human understanding to this question, but it does lead us deep within our psyche and opens us up to our soul. It is a place where souls can meet and find healing.

Thoughts give rise to the ability comprehend an idea. We go through a series of wanderings to make sense of the world around us. This path into the grief process eventually leads us to the realization that the intellect will not give us what we are looking for. Although our thoughts are a form of expressing our grief, they simply lead us to more and more questions there are no answers to.

Feelings give expression to our thoughts on a given situation which may give rise to more emotional pain knowing we cannot understand what is happening. This is felt in the body and moves in and through us. We tire and eventually give up on using our mind and body this way. Eventually, we move into exhaustion and have no energy to feel anything.

Spirit gives us hope in life hereafter, but it does not take away our grief. The expression of prayer and hope in life hereafter does allow us to bring into our grief a sense of consolation. Funeral services include various songs and scriptures allowing us to have words to comfort us. The ability to cope through faith allows us to place some of our grief in a power greater than ourselves.

When you combine the mind, body, and spirit's capacity to deal with grief in an integrated way, we often find a sense of peace. This is what is known in many sacred texts as "a peace beyond understanding." To know “The Unknowable” or “Creator of All Things” is to trust in the wisdom that has created us all. This is perhaps the journey into letting go on the highest level of our being possible. Here, we are able to trust that there will be a tomorrow and grief will not and cannot kill the relationship we had with our loved one. Instead, we begin to relate to each other on the level of soul. This is the place where our soul can create channels of expression with our dying loved one no other way is possible.

As you can see, the answer to the question of "why" is my loved one going through this is not as important as where this internal process leads us inside our being. This place can be nurtured and cared for by those willing to listen attentively to another’s desire and need to be heard from such depths. This act of going into such sacred space where one's soul is healing simply by sharing one's pain with those who care allows us to heal in places our hands cannot touch.

Here are three final points to consider when you find yourself with someone who asks the question “why does my loved one have to suffer?” First, listen “fully” to one’s grief and their questions on suffering. Make sure you have listened to another’s grief as outlined earlier in this article.

Second, since you have no control over a person’s journey into dying or the timing of his/her passing from this life to the next, try to get the surviving loved one voice what their loved one will be released of in their dying and themselves as a caregiver. This step requires a great deal of honesty, and you will not probably get this unless you have fully listened to someone tell you about their grief of losing their loved one.

Finally, your ability to help someone through this phase of grief will help the dying loved one and loved one’s who survive build incredible trust in you as the caregiver, volunteer, minister, social worker, nurse, and doctor.

Samuel Oliver is the author of, "What the Dying Teach Us: Lessons on Living" For more on this author; http://www.soulandspirit.org

Funerals - Military Funerals

By Michael Russell

In this article we're going to discuss funerals that have more tradition associated with them than probably any other. Military funerals.

Military funerals are loaded with tradition. A final farewell to a fallen comrade is one of the most glorious events that any person can attend.




The first thing that one notices at a military funeral is the flag draped casket. The blue field of the flag is placed at the head of the casket, just over the left shoulder of the deceased. This custom actually began long ago during the Napoleonic Wars of the 18th century. A flag was used to cover the dead as they were taken off the battle field.

If you take a good look, you will notice that the horses that pull the casket during a military funeral all have saddles on them. However, the horses on the left have riders on them while the horses on the right do not. This is also taken from old times when the primary means of moving ammunition was by horse. The riderless horses carried the provisions.

There is a single riderless horse that follows the procession. This horse is called the caparisoned horse because of its ornamental coverings. By tradition, in a military funeral, this horse follows the casket only of a soldier of rank colonel or above or the casket of the President, who is the commander in chief of the armed forces.

At the graveside itself, military honors consist of the firing of three volleys, each by seven service members. This is very often confused with the 21 gun salute, which is actually for honors not associated with funerals at all. However, the number of guns fired in both are the same.

The three volleys came from an old battlefield custom. The two sides at war with each other would cease fighting in order to clear their dead from the battlefield. The firing of the three volleys meant that the dead soldiers had all been removed from the field and that battle could resume. War was relatively civilized back then.

In the case of the death of a former or current president, there are additional salutes and traditions. On the day following the death of a president unless the day falls on a Sunday or a holiday, the commanders of each army installation order that one gun be fired every half hour beginning at reveille and ending at retreat. In the case of a Sunday or a holiday this is held over until the next day.

On the actual day of the funeral, the 21 minute gun salute is fired starting at noon at all military installations across the country. These guns are fired at one minute intervals. Also, on the day of the funeral there is a 50 gun salute. This is one gun for each state. This is done at five-second intervals upon lowering of the flag for the day. "Hail To The Chief" is then played if the funeral is for a past or present president.

Michael Russell
Your Independent guide to Funerals

Life Insurance: The Origin of Premiums, Policies, and Plans

By Evan C Davis

The concept of insurance probably began in China over five thousand years ago. Others will argue that insurance began slightly later, in Babylonia. In any case, ancient peoples were interested in protecting against loss. They devised insurance systems to protect the investments underpinning trade efforts, particularly with respect to goods shipped across the seas. It was centuries after the first "insurance policies" were drafted in efforts to aid commerce, that the concept of life insurance took hold in ancient Rome.





The ancient Romans believed that anyone who was wrongly buried would become "an unhappy ghost." This idea of a "forlorn and shivering spirit in an agony of loneliness" so bothered the Romans that they tended to invest large sums in elaborate burials.

Although the belief in the importance of "correct" burial reached through all levels of society, resources did not. Roman society suffered a rather large gap between the rich and the poor. Those on the lower socioeconomic strata, including many soldiers, lacked the requisite resources for a proper Roman burial.

These factors led to the creation of burial clubs. Groups of individuals formed and all members were required to regularly donate to a common fund that was used in the event of a member's death to fund his funeral. A Roman military leader, Marius, created a burial club among his troops in approximately 100 B.C. and many similar organizations came into being in this era. Eventually, the practice grew to include providing a stipend to the survivors of the deceased.

The Roman burial clubs represent the beginning of life insurance as we know it. A group of people enters into a voluntary agreement to pay premiums that are used to provide benefits to any paying member of the group who happens to die. Stripped to its essence, life insurance today, in all of its complexity and with all of its variations, still bears a remarkable resemblance to the burial clubs of ancient Rome.

The idea of the Roman burial club was compelling then. The Roman government was not fond of organizations of any sort forming-perceiving them as potential breeding grounds for challengers to the power structure. The burial clubs, however, were allowed to exist. The sensibility of their plan was obvious even to tyrants.

Today we may be more concerned with providing replacement income for the family of the deceased than we are about funerary expenses. We also tend to worry considerably less about whether or not a funeral might produce a forlorn or shivering ghost. We still do, however, embrace the principle that the financial strength of many, when combined, can produce necessary results for others in difficult times. Life insurance continues today because those underlying principles remain unchanged.

We don't often see ourselves as being akin to Roman legionnaires marching into battle, but those of us who pay our life insurance premiums in an effort to protect ourselves and our family from expense and difficulty do share a common trait with the ancients who invented life insurance in the form of burial clubs.

Evan C. Davis works in Medicare customer service and is the webmaster and owner of Easy Insurance Finder. Find out more about cheap life insurance quotes online and low cost term life premiums at http://www.easy-insurance-finder.com/

Man Fakes Death to Qualify for Mortgage

By Martin Lukac

Allen Wolford of Colorado came to the conclusion that the only way to qualify for a home mortgage was to die.

The embalmer wanted to purchase a home with his wife, but with $50,000 in debt, he did not qualify. So he made a decision.

His faked death certificate said that he died from cardiac arrest. Wolford is now facing 3 years in prison on forgery, and he still didn't get the mortgage.

The official arrest affidavit shows that Wolford told police that he faked his death in order to rid himself of nearly $50,000 in debts. In fact, almost $42,000 was from child support he had failed to pay.

He is being held without bail in the El Paso County jail on suspicion of forgery and a fugitive warrant from California for parole violation and larceny.

Wolford, who worked for the Evergreen Funeral Home in Colorado Springs, confessed to creating a false death certificate.

"I didn't think I'd get caught. I guess it was pretty stupid," Wolford told police officer Connie Guthrie. He said that he attempted the plan because the lingering debts had disqualified his family from a mortgage loan.

The West Virginia State Child Support Division received an e-mail copy of the phony death with a note saying his wife was not responsible for her deceased husband's back child support.

Wolford told police that his wife didn't know anything about the scheme.

Wolford also sent a copy of the death certificate to the Colorado attorney general's office, since he owed $7,000 in student loans to the state of Colorado.

The agencies that received the death certificate tried to verify it wiht the El Paso County vital statistics office. The office had no record of the certificate on file. They contacted the funeral home listed, who then went to the police.

Wolford will probably not be approved for a mortgage for several years to come, if ever.

Martin Lukac, represents http://www.RateEmpire.com , a finance web-company specializing in real estate/mortgage market. We specialize in daily updates, rate predictions, mortgage rates and more. Find low home loan mortgage interest rates from hundreds of mortgage companies! Visit http://www.RateEmpire.com today

In Memory of Dave; Homosexual Suicide

By Lance Winslow

Dave was a young man in college, a track star on a scholarship. Dave was not like the other men on the team as he rarely dated much. One day Dave told the team he was gay. About a month later after he went home for thanks giving dinner something happened with his family and before Christmas he killed himself.

I cannot tell you what it did to his family afterwards, I guess they should have thought about it before they did and said whatever it was they said, which they never did say at the funeral. I cannot know how involved Dave really was, I am not sure if I would have ever called him gay, but he did not date any of the gals, some pretty fine ones too, were often available. Runners are know for their stamina both on and off the track so getting a young lady was never much of a challenge compared to the strenuous work outs of the team.




I think many of us always kind of wondered why Dave did not date and when we found out that he had turned gay, I do not think anybody was super surprised. I don’t think to me it really mattered, Dave was Dave and that was good enough for the team and for me. Apparently from what I have read this is not so uncommon. But it is a tragedy and it sucks big time. It is not right.

It is unfortunate that it ended this way for Dave, as he was quite the athlete, gentleman and a scholar. It might be wise if we are to careful to judge others and understand these issues more. I am not gay nor do I believe that is something I would recommend aspiring too, but rather think that everyone needs to live and let live a little. Consider this in 2006.

"Lance Winslow" - Online Think Tank forum board. If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance in the Online Think Tank and solve the problems of the World; http://www.worldthinktank.net/

Life Assurance and Life Insurance

By Michael Bens

Life insurance has no ‘investment value’ while Life Assurance is strictly for investment purposes only in most instances. Most life insurance policies provide a measure of ‘security’ and hope to policyholders for the length of the term. However, the policy must be active when the policyholder dies; otherwise, there is no coverage available. If the policyholder has an active policy and finds that he is ill, expected to live a short time, then the policyholder will have the coverage he needs. On the other hand, if the policyholder meets the term of life coverage and extends to another year, then the policy is often outdated. Thus, the life insurance coverage plans are operable when the policyholder has a ‘claim.’




As you can see life insurance, policy has nothing to offer in line of investment, thus if you are searching to invest in policies then you will need to consider the life assurance plans. Life Assurance is an investment value package, and the policy unites ’guaranteed insurance” and ’none guaranteed investment.’ If the policyholder takes out an assurance policy of 50,000 then the policies value is equal to the ’guaranteed sum’ of the ’policy.’ Of course, this will include the length of the term the policy is active. The investment will also be factored on the “Insurance Company’s Investment Performance.”

For the most part life insurance companies that offer assurance plans will ‘payout’ the guaranteed sum on the policy, ‘or the value of the annual investment bonuses” if any were incorporated during the term of agreement. As you can see, the investment is the initial costs of the assurance policy, but if you purchase bonuses throughout the term of the policy, you will have invested in equity so to speak. This means that during the course of the term equity is building on the life insurance plan. Thus, when considering Life Assurance calculate the timeframe that you expect the term to extend.

Unlike life insurance policies, if you survive life assurance plans you will receive ‘terminal’ investment, bonuses and investment payouts. If you have life insurance and live beyond the term then there is no payout. Life Assurance policies are often nicer to have than life insurance coverage if you are searching for investment, since the policyholder can cash in on investments after extended time allotted on the policy. Still, if the policyholder wishes to do so, he could sell his policy to another investor or broker and make additional profit. In some instances, an assurance holder receives more profit by selling out on the policy.

The downside is that nowadays the assurance policies are not worth the investment price if sold to third parties and few companies’ have incorporated stipulations on cashing in on assurance policies. Make sure you read your terms to find out more about cash INS, because few companies’ charge fees for cash INS.

Life insurance policies are more affordable than life assurance plans. For the most part life insurance is for those that do not wish to invest. At one time investors were wise to take out life assurance plans, but nowadays the hassle involved may not be worth the time, investment and bonuses combined. Life insurance again does not have equity, and once the policy ends there is no money involved. Thus, if you are considering life insurance make sure you keep up with renewals so that your loved ones are covered if death occurs. Life insurance is optional over life assurance policies, since it will offer you coverage for funeral and mortgage payouts if you have combined the policy, thus covering mortgage.

For more information on life insurance and life assurance, the best place to look is online. Online you will find a wealth of information that will help you understand which policy is right for you. Finally, if you are considering life insurance you may want to discuss Critical Illness and Terminal Illness, since it will cover illness, mortgage, medical expenses, and so forth.

Authored by Michael Bens. For more great information about all forms of insurance visit our free online insurance publication the Gabae Insurance Source to find the information you're looking for!

Also you can check out Gabae Insurance Articles to find the articles' you're looking for!

Funerals - Common Questions

By Michael Russell

In this article we're going to cover some of the most commonly asked questions people have when it comes to preparing for a funeral and try to give some simple answers to them.

The first question most people ask is, "What's the advantage of advanced planning for a funeral?"

If you've never had to plan for a funeral before then you have no idea how much work is involved. There's the mortician, cemetery, clergy, flowers, limo and hearse service and the list goes on and on. Having to do all this the last minute while at the same time suffering through what could be a traumatic loss is more than any one person should have to go through. But with advanced planning, all of this is already taken care of. All that needs to be done is in the days prior to the funeral, make the necessary calls letting whoever is coordinating all this know that the person is deceased. It really does make life a lot easier for those left behind.




Another commonly asked questions is, "What do I do with the body?"

For each family this is a personal decision but many families aren't even aware of the options that they have open to them. The first thing they have to decide is whether this will be a burial or cremation. Then they have to decide who is going to handle the remains. If the body is living outside the state or country in which burial is to take place then plans have to be made for transportation of the body across state lines. There are usually laws governing such transportation. In the case of cross country transportation then the U.S. Embassy has to get involved.

Then there is the question, "How long do I wait before burial?"

This question is usually answered by the religion of the deceased. For example, in the Jewish faith a person must be buried within three days. In other traditions burial must be made within a day of death. What is becoming very common is to have a quick burial within a few days and then have a more elaborate memorial service in the near future.

Another common question is, "What do I do about viewing and visitation?"

Again, this is a personal matter. Some religions don't even allow viewing of the body after death. Also, the family has to decide if the body is even suitable for viewing. In the case of a terrible accident this may not be a good idea. As for visitation, this is also a matter of personal preference though in some religions there is a designated period for mourning and visitation such as in the Jewish faith where the family sits shivah for seven days during which time family and friends come to visit and pay their respects.

Many of the questions about funerals are really a matter of common sense and what is dictated by the person's religion and the laws of the state where they live. If in doubt about anything simply ask your clergy or people in your faith who have gone through the process of having planned a funeral.

Michael Russell
Your Independent guide to Funerals

Funerals - Do It Yourself Funerals

By Michael Russell

In this article we're going to discuss something that has become a growing trend in the United States. Do it yourself funerals.

It is no secret that funeral costs in the United States are through the roof and the sad truth is, many people can't afford a lavish funeral. Some can't even afford a bare bones funeral. For these people, and these reasons, do it yourself funerals are becoming very popular in the United States.





So, just what is a do it yourself funeral?

It's pretty much what it sounds like. It is a funeral that you handle completely on your own, within reason as there are still some legalities that have to be abided by in the United States.

One of the legalities is that for any person who dies in the United States, a death certificate must be issued by a certified medical examiner. The cost of this is relatively cheap and in some cases can be done away with. The death certificate charges vary depending on the state that death occurs in.

After that, there are no particular requirements for interment. A person can either be buried or cremated. However, and this may come as a surprise, there is no law that says that a person must be buried in a cemetery. There are certain health codes that have to be adhered to during a burial, but as far as location, a person can be buried in your back yard if you so prefer.

The truth of the matter is, until the 1900's, death was a family matter. The body would usually be on view in the living room until the time for burial. There were no big funeral parlors with fancy ceremonies. As time went by the funeral industry took over this time of death in a family's life, butmany families are trying to take it back.

Families are starting to build their own coffins. They're nothing fancy, usually just made of wood. For those who are not particularly religious they don't even use clergy. Instead they write up their own funeral services and perform these services themselves. Inside their home made coffins the family will usually put items belonging to the deceased.

Burial itself is a little more tricky as permits are required to bury the dead on private property, but they can be gotten after a lot of red tape has been cut. At that time it is perfectly common and okay for a family to bury their loved one underneath the cyprus tree in their back yard.

For those who think that an undertaker needs to be part of a funeral, this is true in only eight of the 50 states.

As for those on a really tight budget, these people usually turn to cremation and keep the ashes in an urn somewhere in their home. Cremations are relatively cheap, at about $700.

Yes, do it yourself funerals are becoming the rage for many people today, and as funeral costs continue to skyrocket it should come as no surprise.

Michael RussellYour Independent guide to Funerals

Insurance for Old People

By Michael Lastun

When you are young everything seems to be perfect and nothing can spoil the glamour, but with time our point of view changes. What was all white and beautiful becomes grey. It is not a reason to get worried, but for our safety we must have the certainty that nothing can catch us unaware. Is important not only for us but for the people around us too.

Usually the insurance for the old people is a long term one and have some aspects which must be respected. For elder people the society has taken care by founding collective units where all the expenses: medical care, food, clothes and funeral are guaranteed by the insurance.

There are people who participate to the insurance program and try to do there best in their job. The life insurance for old people is the wage of a life work. This is one of the reasons many people consider to be the society’s duty: a decent living, without any deprivations. Those who take care of old are being paid by the insurance company. The insurance for old people takes care that the place where they live is the right one and the conditions registered in the insurance agreement are respected.

Every insurance has some agreements and terms which must be respected. The person who signs the insurance policy must mention a voucher who will take care that everything will be done according to the laws.

The insurance for old people can be violated only in certain conditions and never before. If the beneficiary dies the insurance will take care of the funeral and all the other logistics. The insurance for old people is the policy for help when is needed.

There are many cases when the lack of knowledge regarding life insurance had great repercussions on the financial state of the owners.

If you find this information useful you should visit the site Veterans universal life insurance where you will find lots of interesting articles related to this topic, all original and wrote by Michael Lastun.

What is Grief?

by Ann Estlund

A friend asked me, "What is grief, exactly?"

I gave him the simple answer: "Grief is the natural response of a body and mind to a traumatic loss." But, I realized that definition doesn't help anyone who has not grieved really understand grief, nor does it alleviate grief for anyone experiencing it. Whether we care about our own or someone else's grief, we must study the process and its symptoms to be helpful.




Symptoms can include feelings of despair, depression, hopelessness, helplessness, disorientation, confusion, anxiety, anger, lethargy and fatigue. It's not unusual, though, to also include periods of elation, smugness and wittiness. We who have grieved also might warn that we have difficulties concentrating, calculating, making decisions, reading and comprehending, especially at first. We also show unstable and erratic emotions, eating patterns and sleep habits for months or even years. We can seem pretty odd, but I encourage everyone to learn and be patient, because someday they may walk in our shoes.

Understanding Grief's Stages

We need to learn about grief's stages, so we can recognize appropriate behaviors and know how and when to reach out with help for others or seek it for ourselves. Authorities disagree on the number and names of the stages, as well as why the stages differ so widely from person to person. Most do agree that widowhood and loss of a child trigger the most profound grief, and the highest levels of stress. Grief follows no set pattern, but it moves through stages, with erratic symptoms often appearing without warning.

Major variations can occur because of the loss itself, whether the griever witnessed the death, and personal characteristics such as personality, age, independence, spirituality, and training. My only advice is: Never judge a griever by your own experience or someone elses. We are each unique.. Stages of Grief Shock/Numbness My own period of shock felt like being inside a protective bubble, tumbling through my nightmare as a remote observer. I walked and talked and faked life, but I wasn't actively engaged.

Confusion/Disorientation I felt left out, unaware of anything but myself. I often felt quite superior that I knew things others did not. I was unable to read well or drive a car reliably for several weeks.

Denial Like shock, denial cushions us from what we cannot handle. Eventually denial can make us prisoners of our grief, so we may need to seek help to face reality and suffer the pain of it.

Anxiety I fought anxiety with massage, exercise and an occasional pill, but often I lost the battle. In a pre-dawn panic attack, I knew I was dying just as my husband had months earlier.

Anger Few escape anger for having been left alone, for having too much to do; for poor record-keeping, etc. Once I learned anger was actually normal, I found many reasons to be angry.

Guilt Nearly all survivors suffer guilt, most without real cause. Even those with good reason to feel guilty must work through these feelings so they can move forward. Guilt is destructive, never helpful. Depression

Having nursed friends through depression, I knew enough to have anti-depressants to take at the first sign of losing control. I watched myself carefully. I urge others to seek help if they have a single thought of suicide or abuse of others. I tell them to say over and over, "I need help," until they get it.

Cockiness Although not included in most lists of stages, many go through periods of cockiness. I felt alert, capable and in control, and I knew grief wouldn't get me down. A little bit is okay, but it isn't real.

Acceptance This is the "carrot" that leads us on in this race with reality. We must accept our husband's or child's death as real and final, but we also must accept our life alone as real and as a new opportunity.

We all wish we could skip right to Acceptance, but it's the lessons learned in other stages that make acceptance possible. Don't rush the process; be patient. Grief is complex and varied, but it touches us all. We must all learn about its basics so we can better help ourselves or others.

Funerals - Planning The Wake

By Michael Russell

People do expect a wake for some reason, particularly if they've travelled some distance to be at a funeral.




The wake needs to be appropriate to the deceased and also to those likely to attend the funeral. A few pounds behind the bar at your local pub might be fine if Great Uncle George was a regular there but might not go down so well if his one living sister is a tea-totaller. In an instance like this, you may have to have two wakes to satisfy everyone.

If you have a large enough house and can face the preparations, you may want to invite everyone back to your place after the funeral. This can be problematical as you have no idea how many people will come, but if you are smart about the catering, all will be well.

Standard funeral fare is sandwiches and savoury nibbles plus maybe some biscuits or cakes. You can make it as plain or exotic as you wish and can do a full buffet if you want to. Try to get some friends round to help you make sandwiches. Decide on a variety of fillings and set up a production line. This way will be quick and organised. Bear in mind that you may have vegetarians there so don't forget egg or cheese as well as ham and tuna.

Savouries such as mini-quiches or pizzas and sausage rolls always go down well. Buy them ready made and frozen. That way, you can pop more in the oven as required and the rest won't go to waste if they're still frozen.

To drink, some people will expect tea so get someone to man the teapot. Others will accept a small sherry and others still will use this gathering to pour as much beer or scotch down as they can get away with. Unlike a normal party, however, most people will only stay for a couple of drinks, so you don't have to buy up the whole off licence. On the other hand, if you can get a sale or return arrangement with your local shop, you can cover all eventualities and quantities.

Make sure that you have plenty of cups, tea plates, paper napkins and glasses.

If you don't want to cater at home, then a pub is an ideal venue. However, even if you're not asking for food, do forewarn the landlord. Rolling up with 20 or 30 people and expecting there to be sufficient bar staff on duty just isn't on. Actually, you may want to get the pub to provide some food. Again, sandwiches and savouries are a good idea, particularly to soak up alcohol. Ask the pub if they'll provide tea and coffee too as not everyone will want an alcoholic drink in the middle of the day.

Follow these few simple rules and your loved one should have the send off that they envisaged.

Michael Russell
Your Independent guide to Funerals

Sudden and Unexplained Infant Death in Young Babies

By Alan Murray

This is more commonly known as ‘cot death’.

This usually occurs in young babies from the ages of one week to two years.

There is no explanation for this despite lots of research being carried out and is a most traumatic time for all concerned. Research into the subject have found that there are certain preventative measures which can reduce the risk however this does not mean that it can be reduced altogether.





The following is a list of preventative measures

1. Both parents should stop smoking prior to pregnancy

2. Do not let anyone smoke in the same room as your baby

3. Always place your baby on his or her back when placing him or her down to sleep in the cot. Place your baby as near to the foot of his or her cot as you can. This measure prevents the baby being free to wriggle about and being able to move the bedclothes

4. Never place a pillow in the cot and use as firm mattress as possible

5. Never wrap your baby up in bedclothes. Keep your baby’s head uncovered and pull the bedclothes up to shoulder height only

6. Never have too many heavy bedclothes on the bed. Use light sheets and blankets which can be added and removed as necessary

7. Never have the room too hot. Do not place the cot too near to any heat source such as a radiator or fire. Keep the temperature of the room constant

8. Try and keep your baby in the same room as you for the first six months. If this not possible then purchase a baby monitor and carry out regular checks during the night on your baby

Sudden and unexplained infant death syndrome must be investigated by the police.

This adds further distress to the grieving parents as many questions will be asked and also the baby’s bedclothes may be taken away for forensic examination.

There may also be a ‘post mortem’ carried out on the baby to establish the cause of death. When a post mortem is carried out, there may be biological samples taken aswell as parts of the baby’s brain. These samples need to be analysed and the results may take up to six weeks.

Once a post mortem is carried out and a cause of death established, a death certificate will be issued by the pathologist. This certificate will be needed for funeral arrangements to be made. If a cause of death is not established at the post mortem, then the baby will be kept in storage until the results of the samples have been established. After this then the baby will be released and a death certificate published.

Most undertakers have special pricing arrangements for ‘baby deaths’.

Gillian Docherty writes for the Unique baby names, Childhood diseases site, and http://www.top-100-baby-names.name/

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For Advertisers or the owner of Products or service. You can select the blog for advertise on blogs that have target readers relevant to your customers and give hire them to write the opinion about your product or service. This is a good place in the cyber world for promoting the products or service. As my blog the products or service maybe the service about funeral, Flowers delivery, Products for the family the loved one die, Memory site service and any product or service relate for the readers. You can click for registration at Advertisers side in Smorty web site.

Life Insurance Basics: Getting Started

By Megan Mahan

Let’s be honest. The topic of life insurance isn’t exciting or glamorous, but it is important. In fact, many experts consider life insurance to be the cornerstone of good financial planning.
But how do you know if you need life insurance? How much is enough? What kind of life insurance policy is best for you?

Answering these basic questions about life insurance will help to simplify the shopping process and ultimately allow you to select the best policy to secure your family’s future for years to come.




Establishing Your Needs

To clear up any misconceptions, life insurance is designed to protect your loved ones from financial loss in the event of your death. Knowing this, it’s important to establish whether you need life insurance and how much you should purchase.

According to MetLife you generally need life insurance if:

• You have a spouse
  
• You have dependent children
  
• Relatives or elderly parents depend on your income
  
• Your retirement funds are not enough to provide for your spouse’s future
  
• You own a business
  
• You have a large estate The beneficiaries of your life insurance policy can use the proceeds

from your life insurance to:

• Pay for last expenses and funeral costs
  
• Cover estate taxes (if applicable)
  
• Pay off existing debts (mortgage, car loan, credit card debt)
  
• Pay for everyday expenses (food, clothing, childcare)
  
• Put towards your spouse’s retirement fund

Donate to charity If you don’t have dependents, you may still wish to purchase a life insurance policy to avoid becoming a financial burden to your loved ones in the untimely event of your death. Young singles also benefit from purchasing life insurance while they’re young and healthy, allowing them to secure a low premium for years to come.

Choosing a Dollar Amount

Figuring out how much life insurance your loved ones would need to maintain their quality of living can be tough. Generally speaking, experts recommend purchasing between 5 and 10 times your annual salary. But, as MetLife points out, your exact need for life insurance will depend on your personal and financial circumstances.

You can get a ballpark estimate of your life insurance needs by first totaling the funds your family would need for the abovementioned items (funeral costs, daily living, etc.). You can find helpful worksheets online that will help you organize and come up with this list of expenses.

After you’ve totaled your expenses, take stock of the funds you have in cash, savings, retirement accounts, bonds, property, pension and Social Security. Subtracting your financial resources from your expenses will give you a rough idea of how much life insurance you should purchase.

When it comes to choosing how much life insurance to purchase, it’s a good idea to get an idea of your needs before buying a policy—but your licensed life insurance professional will undoubtedly help you choose a dollar amount that accurately reflects the needs of your beneficiaries.

Selecting a Policy

Generally speaking, there are two types of life insurance: term life insurance and permanent life insurance. The type of policy you select will depend largely on your life insurance needs and what resources you have to pay life insurance premiums.

Term Life Insurance Term life insurance, as the name suggests, will cover you for a specified amount of time, which means the insurer will only pay out a death benefit if you die during the term of your policy.

According to the Insurance Information Institute (I.I.I.), most people purchase a 20-year term policy, although smaller terms are available. Of course, you can renew your term life policy after it expires, although your premiums may increase as you age. But all in all, because of the “temporary” nature of term life insurance, policies are generally much cheaper and are therefore an attractive option for young people and families with a limited income.
Permanent Life Insurance On the other hand, permanent life insurance, as you might have guessed, is permanent. A permanent life policy will pay out a death benefit whether you die tomorrow or in 60 years.

Permanent life insurance is also an appealing option for many because of the added benefit of the policy growing on a tax-deferred basis, which can grow to be fairly large over time. As a policyholder, you may be able to borrow against this cash value while alive, which has been of great help to some. Of course, most loans need to be paid back otherwise they will be subtracted from the death benefit, and your beneficiaries may have to liquidate assets to pay back the loan.
Nonetheless, permanent life insurance offers a wide variety of saving and investment options. Because of this, policies are generally more expensive than term policies, which may be hard for young adults to handle.

Your life insurance professional will help you decide which type of policy is best for your life insurance needs—and your budget. But researching these policy types beforehand can help you narrow down which policies appeal to you.

Knowledge is Power

No, learning about life insurance and planning for the unexpected isn’t glamorous, but it is important. So take advantage of consumer resources and talk to a life insurance professional about purchasing affordable life insurance. You’ll rest easier at night knowing your loved ones are taken care of for years to come!

About InsureMe
Megan L. Mahan is a copywriter and insurance information expert with InsureMe in Englewood, Colorado. InsureMe links agents nationwide with consumers shopping for insurance. Specializing in auto, home, health, long-term care and life insurance quotes, the InsureMe network provides thousands of agents with insurance leads every year. For more information, visit InsureMe.com.

I Slept In a Tomb

By Lynn Moriarty Parman

It was 1990 and her Bible was chock full of letters and notes from children and grandchildren extolling her virtues. Drawers and store rooms were not disturbed since Joyce's death four years earlier. But her plants were taken care of and they were thriving. One small room downstairs has become my brother's dressing room and his new wife's office. Stacks of newspapers and magazines from two accounting businesses tower near their living room chairs.





I saw collections of trinkets etc, not disturbed in the beautiful antique show cases for china; crucifixes and "Mary" mementos, and a beautiful wooden rosary draped on one wall as I had noticed the last time I visited, when Joyce was alive. A library of books is undisturbed in the upstairs hall, and the Grandfather clock ticking away time, chimes nine p.m.in the hallowed halls of memory. A collection of bells, carnival glass and Hummel's is dusty on another shelf.There's a family picture gallery on a 5-tiered corner shelf, family wedding pictures, group pictures, baby pictures and grandkids. Even the kitchen cupboards have been undisturbed....the new wife eating out or at her own home across town.

When will my brother put my sister-in-law to rest? When he and his new wife have found a place of their own? Who will go through her things? Jewelry boxes, sewing drawers. Will he walk away from this antique shrine just taking his clothes and a few personal items, leaving the six children to clean out the drawers? Or will he actually experience the necessary part of grieving by sorting through his first wife's personal drawers, books etc. and letting the grown children decide what mementos they would like to keep of their mother's? She was a real home body, sewing and cooking for her kids and grandkids. She had a great sense of humor. It truly was sad when she fell over dead while working in her flower garden at the age of 47. I was present at that funeral but felt strange sleeping in a virtual tomb four years later, the bed that had been their marriage bed. My brother had not slept in it since her death. It helped me to understand the grief process is different with everyone who must experience it. And that there is no set time for getting on with your life. Sigmund Freud wrote in a letter to a friend: "Although we know that after such a loss the acute state of mourning will subside, we also know that we shall remain inconsolable and will never find a substitute. No matter what may fill the gap, even if it be filled completely it nevertheless remains something else."

Lynn Moriarty Parman is author of Mushroom Marathon, Running Toward the Prize of Serenity 2004, Authorhouse. For more information go to her website at http://www.images-of-joy-literature.com/

The Most Important Person In The Room

By Don Adams

While he wasn't my very best friend, his friendship was, nevertheless, important to me. For over 30 years, we had shared food and drink, baseball games, our kids soccer events and much laughter.

At his funeral, I stood at the back of the parlor hall and watched dozens of his friends pay their last respects to his family. There were many hugs, gentle kisses, warm handshakes and, of course, a flood of tears. As all those people were expressing their genuine condolences to the bereaved family, it occurred to me that I was probably the most important person in the room right then. Not in an arrogant or presumptuous sense... but in a practical one.





You see, in addition to our friendship I was also his life insurance agent. It wasn't easy because, like so many naive individuals, he resisted each time I approached him about the subject. Like many well-meaning, caring, loving husbands and fathers... he didn't want to talk about it. Not for a long time anyway. But, I didn't give up because I've witnessed dozens of unexpected deaths that without the benefit of life insurance would have devastated families and businesses.

Because I cared so much for him and his family, I pursued until finally - at long last - the $1,000,000 policy was put into effect. And so... there I was in the back of the room. And, when it was my turn to gently kiss his grieving spouse and warmly hug his kids, I didn't just express my sorrow... I reminded them that in a matter of days a great deal of money was going to be available for them to secure their lifestyle for the rest of their lives.

The power of life insurance is truly awesome! What a shame most people don't understand or appreciate its value. And what a bigger shame it is for these same naive people to make fun of or even ridicule life insurance agents. The reality of death cannot be denied. Yet, under normal circumstances the prediction of any one particular death is impossible. This is why life insurance is based on the principle of large numbers. There is a science of prediction based on the similarity of statistically large groups of people. Without this ability to predict the larger scale version of death, it would be impossible to buy a life insurance policy for a reasonable price. And yet, our individual deaths will undeniably and irrevocably occur.

For most of us, the death of a loved one or a business partner is cause for financial concern. Either the loss of family income is potentially devastating or the intrinsic commercial value is almost impossible to replace. In most instances, the tax-free death proceeds from a life insurance policy can greatly reduce the financial pain and, perhaps, even remove it completely. Life insurance is the most misunderstood financial asset anyone could own. Yet, it should be the cornerstone of every financial plan. Without the tax-free proceeds of a life insurance policy most financial plans will crumble in only a matter of time.

This article will not venture into the turf of product types. We'll save the classic "buy term and invest the difference" argument for a later presentation. In the meantime, I'll leave you with this thought. I have delivered in excess of 15 million dollars of tax-free life insurance proceeds over the past 25 years. Children have completed their education because of this... mortgages have been paid off because of this... businesses with hundreds of employees have survived because of this. At no time ... ever ... did anyone who accepted their tax-free check ask me what type of policy it came from. They simply didn't care... and why should they? The death proceeds from a life insurance policy is the greatest gift anyone could leave to a loved one.

So, the next time a life insurance agent wants to discuss life insurance with you... for heavens sake listen up! That agent could become the most important person in the room when your loved ones are grieving your demise. Make sure that agent can deliver what your family is going to need the most because you can no longer provide it for them.

More helpful information regarding personal finance may be found at http://personal-finance-on-the-net.com/

Cremation And The Wandering Jews

By Dr. Mel Glazer

As every Jew knows, cremation is a no-no. That having been said, lots and lots of Jews are requesting that they be cremated. Why all of a sudden? What happened to the post-Holocaust cringe when thinking about yet another burned Jewish body? As a Conservative Rabbi, I will not officiate at the funeral of a congregant which is followed with cremation. I will, however, officiate at such a funeral for a non-congregant. It's tough out there in the vineyards of the Lord, and difficult to be either consistent or resistant to the growing wishes of the hordes when they insist on cremation. Most Reform Rabbis will officiate without condition at funerals followed by cremation.

I firmly believe that the cemetery is the place where Jewish bodies should be buried, and not so much for halachic reasons, but for grief recovery reasons. You see, when someone dies, we are left with all sorts of emotions--grief, sadness, incompleteness, shock, disjointedness, numbness, blame and even anger. And it hurts so much. We need to complete our relationship with those who have died, so that our relationship with them can "rest in peace." So often the cemetery serves as the healing venue.

When we can go spend private time next to Momma's grave and apologize to her for whatever we might have done to hurt her, and forgive her for whatever she might have done to hurt us, the cemetery becomes a holy place for us. What do we do if there is no burial in a cemetery, or if the ashes are scattered to the winds? In that case, healing is much more difficult, since there is no physical place to assist us in our efforts. For this reason, halacha supports emotional truth, as it usually does. We need to "lay them gently down," and we can do that best in the cemetery by their grave.
http://www.yourgriefmatters.com/